5 Phases of Marriage

Through the passage of time, marriage goes through some predictable phases.

PHASE 1 - PASSION

You're head over heels in love and ecstatically happy that you've finally found your soul mate.

PHASE 2 - "WHAT DID I SEE IN HIM/HER?"

This second phase is a really difficult one. This is where reality sets in and you realize your partner has flaws, some of them serious....arguments start and you may find yourself wondering what you ever saw in your partner in the first place. Add to this disillusionment the pressures of daily life and no wonder problems start to develop.

PHASE 3 -"EVERYTHING WOULD BE PERFECT IF MY SPOUSE CHANGED"

You feel that everything would be fine if your spouse changed some annoying behavior or trait. The sad part is that some couples stay suck in the phase forever.

After a while, couples make 1 of 3 choices.

1. give up and decide to divorce

2. give up and decide to stay unhappily married.

3. decide to learn how to have a healthier and happier marriage.

PHASE 4 - ACCEPTANCE

In this phase you realize that you're never going to agree with your partner on every issue. You learn to become more tolerant and forgiving.

PHASE 5-PEACEFUL CO-EXISTENCE

You find peace and harmony together. You start to genuinely like your spouse and start to focus on your partners virtues rather than continue to be obsessed by his/her faults.

You feel proud of the storms you have weathered together and now have a shared history.

By now the kids are probably older and more independent. You can now focus on your marriage and eachother again.

What once looked like an insurmountable problem could be nothing more than a phase.

(I can honestly say that I have spent time in each one of these stages...Loving Stage 5!)

The Mantle

These little Valentine's bags are for each member of our family to put their valentines treats or cards or whatever they want to share with eachother in.  But what I really wanted to share is the color of the paint we have chosen for our family room and kitchen to be painted.  Ordered the paint, now it's just doing it.....It only took us a week to figure out what color to use (after 10 samples).  Now we'll see how long it takes us to actually DO the project....stay tuned and I'll post the finished project:)

February V.T. Message

Cute idea for Visiting Teaching this month on "Managing finances and staying out of debt" you can go to http://www.sugardoodle.info/joomla to get the pattern. These cute little purses have a message by Elder Robert D. Hales written on the flap along with 5 coins which have 5 key steps to financial freedom printed on them. I also plan to add some candy to these little purses.

Another cute idea is this framed quote by Boyd K. Packer that my sister gave me a while back, it is also fitting for this month.  She just printed up the quote on velum and put it on scrapbook paper and framed it.  "Eat it up, Wear it out, Make it do, Or do Without!"

 

Just some thoughts

So, today was sunday and I was so excited to go to church.  I love the feeling of going to sacrament meeting especially on fast sunday and sitting and listening to all of the testimonies being born and just being spiritually fed.  I loved it as usual and felt very thankful for the wonderful ward I get to be a part of.  Then I got to go to class and teach the 14/15 year olds.  I love this class so much.  These kids feel like my own especially since one of them is Stephen and then of course the rest are kids I feel like I've known forever.  However, I dont feel like a very good teacher.  I always leave there feeling like I need to do better.  The kids these days are so much smarter and inquisitive than I ever was at that age.  They truly will be great leaders of the church someday.  Then last but certainly not least I got to read Michael's email that we get each week.  This is where it all came together for me today.  That boy amazes me.  I am constantly in awe of the young man he has become.  His letters are always so uplifting and inspiring.  He has been very blessed to have wonderful companions and serve in wonderful areas on his mission thus far.  His perspective is always positive in spite of any trials they may be having and he always encourages us to live the gospel more to it's fullest.  I am feeling extremely blessed and yet extremely inadequate at the same time tonight.  I know that the Lord loves me and is aware of me as I have witnessed many of his tender mercies on me especially over the past 6 months or so.  I guess now it's my turn to do my part and exercise my faith in what he says he will do as I put my trust in him.

Goofy in Love

Remember when you were all "Goofy in Love" and you couldn't wait to get married?  Ya, well so do I and this is what we looked like.

A project for Bryce and I

So, whenever Bryce is off track it is always hard to find enough projects to keep him busy and not bored.  I hope this one he likes.  Now it's just choosing a color.

Choosing paint color is the hardest thing to do.  The first time we painted the inside of our house we chose a really bold gold color, kind of like the first one you see here.  We painted the entire living room, family room and kitchen. Then in the middle of the night I woke up in a panic!  What have I done!!  It took some getting used to.  This time I want more color than Mike does, but  then again the finished project always looks so different. It's been a tough decision.  I think we have made our choice but now I am scared to death to go and buy it for fear I will do that panic thing again.  Well, I hope Bryce likes to paint!

Memories of an "Angel Sister"

Today marked 3 years since we lost my sweet sister Linda to cancer.  She was a wonderful daughter, mother, aunt, grandmother, sister and friend.  She was an example of love, tenderness, beauty and sweet spiritual strength.  I will for the rest of this mortal life look forward to the day I will be able to embrace her again in the eternities...I pray I may live my life to earn such a great reward.  I have been blessed with a few tender moments of her presence since she has gone and I know that she is not that far away.  I am thankful for her influence in my life and for the many heart to heart talks we regularly had especially during the last few years before she left this mortal life.  Although I know she would not have chosen to leave her husband, children and grandchildren when she did, she was prepared to do so when the call came, and that is very comforting to know.  I feel honored to have shared a place in the same family she grew up in and for her example, guidance and presence in my life.  I am thankful most of all today for the Gospel of Jesus Christ in my life that lets me know that Families are Forever!  For the truths of the plan of Salvation that we have today because of the work of a great Prophet of God.  How thankful I am to have been born to a family where the Gospel could be part of my daily life.  I am eternally grateful for the great honor and privilege it is for me to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  I am truly blessed! 
I love you Linda and I cant wait to see you again!